Remember December
by Be Your Wonderwall
Summary: The story of what I think happened to Mr. Knight. I hate Nickelodeon has something against people with both parents! NOT A SONGFIC!
1. December 5th, 2009

_A/N: Um, okay. I got tired of romance, I mean I am really tired of it. If I read or write another romance story my eyes will fall out of their sockets. (I write way more then I post on here.) Excuse my atrocious grammar, my grammar is at it's best when school is session. That's right! I want_ _school to be in session. Don't kill me. My spelling shouldn't be too bad. (I have spell-check.) Anyways, I have a weird obsession with Kendall and Katie right now. My mind likes to take on weird obsessions for funs sometimes…. Do you guys ever wonder where Mr. Knight is? I do so, this is my fic explaining his absence. Oh, I do NOT own BTR. There would be some changes if I did…_

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**December 5th, 2009**

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"Kendall? Kendall!" my sister whispered frantically at me.

"What?" I snapped glancing at the clock; 2:15 A.M.

"It's Dad," Katie said pulling on my arm.

"What about him?" I asked swinging my legs over the side of my bed.

"He was in a car accident," she said.

It took me a few minutes to process this; my dad was a car accident. I pulled a shirt over my head, and grabbed my sister's hand. I started to run down the stairs, pulling Katie behind me. Mom was talking to a police officer, and sighed in relief as she saw us. I felt Katie tighten her grip on my hand, and I didn't let go like I usually would.

"Kendall, can you watch your sister well, I go to the hospital?" Mom asked tiredly.

"We're going with you, Mom," I said stubbornly.

She sighed, and nodded. I slipped on my shoes, and put on my coat. It was winter, and it was snowing. Katie put on her shoes, and put on her coat. I grabbed the keys from the coffee table, and went out to start the car. Katie followed me, and wrapped her arms around my waist, resting her head on my torso.

"Daddy's going to be okay, right?" she asked close to tears.

"I-I don't know, Katie. I'm sorry," I said hugging her tightly.

I took Katie's hand, and walked back inside where Mom was waiting.

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"Are you Mr. Knight's family?" a doctor asked.

"Yes," Mom answered.

"He would like to see you. He doesn't have much time left," the doctor said.

Katie, Mom, and I stood up, and walked to Dad's room. He looked horrible. He had cast's on both legs, on one arm, and it appeared he had a concussion. Katie was crying against my torso, and I had one arm around her.

"Don't cry, sweetie," Dad slurred through a split lip.

She let go of me, and ran to Dad. I looked at my sneakers awkwardly. This would be so much easier if I had my best friends with me. I walked up to Dad, and he looked up to me.

"Kendall, you need to keep your sister out of trouble. You need to be there for your mom, and for Katie. I'm not going to be here to wish them a merry Christmas, or to watch Katie grow up. I won't be here to be at your wedding. I won't be here for any of that. I need you to be strong," he whispered hoarsely.

"Do have any idea what you're asking me to do, Daddy? I was always there for Mom, and Katie! But I can't replace you! I can't walk Katie down the aisle! I can't graduate without you there! I can't fall in love without you there! I need you!" I exclaimed almost in tears.

I never thought I call him Daddy again. Never. But I guess things chance.

"Kendall, you're my son. You don't need me. As much as I wish you did you don't. You are almost grown up, and you can do it," he said grasping my hand.

"I do need you! You were there at my first hockey game cheering me on, you were the one who drove me to Logan's house to see my best friends in the world, and you were the one who loved me even when I screwed up! I need you! Why can't you understand that I need you? I love you, Daddy!" I said tears running down my face.

"Katie, Kendall, Hannah I love you all so much," he said weakly as his heart beat began to lessen.

Katie buried her face in my stomach, and I held her against me as she sobbed. I closed my eyes, listening to the continuous beep of him flat lining. That was it. My father, Nicholas Andrew Knight, was dead. The doctor came rushing in, and tried to bring him back.

"I'm calling it. 3: 29 A.M," she announced.

Mom enveloped Katie, and I in a hug. We broke apart to walk out to the waiting room, and we just stood there.

"We should get home," Mom said in a tear choked voice.

I nodded, and looked down at my little sister. She was still crying but she was falling asleep standing.

"Will you hit me if I pick you up?" I asked softly.

She shook her head, and let go of me. I picked her up, and she wrapped her arms around my neck. She quickly fell asleep, and looked at Mom.

"What are we going to do?" I sighed tightening my grip on Katie so she wouldn't fall.

"I don't know, Kendall. I really don't. I just need you to be strong for your sister," Mom said looking at her ring.

I nodded slowly, and made my way out to the car. I opened the back door, and set Katie down. I buckled her in, and climbed in next to her. Katie jerked in her sleep, and woke up suddenly. Mom got in just then, she started the car.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Bad dream," she said looking at her surroundings.

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**December 9, 2009**

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"Nicholas Andrew Knight was a wonderful man. He has left behind two children, and a wife. His children are nine and fifteen," the pastor said.

James, Logan, Carlos, and Katie were all sitting next to me. Katie was softly crying, and I held her close. Logan was holding my hand, and comforting me. I'd never thought I'd ever need my best friends to comfort me. I felt tears beginning to run down my face, and wondered when the last time I had cried in front of my friends was. I was six, and I had gotten hurt playing hockey. It was my first broken bone, and I was sobbing. Logan and James were holding my hands, comforting me. Carlos was hugging me, and crying too. When he was younger he would cry every time one of us got hurt. Dad had come out to see what happen, and made Mom stay in the stands, because she was six months pregnant with Katie.

"Nicholas' son would like to say a few words," the pastor said looking at me.

I softly pushed Katie off of me, and she scooted over to Logan. I walked up to the podium, and looked at everyone who was here.

"My dad was a great man. He took me to everyone of my hockey games, and he drove me to my friend's houses to see them. He told me that I couldn't do anything to make him not love me anymore. Sometimes I wondered if he had any idea what a teenage boy is capable of. When I broke my first bone playing hockey, he was the first person to jump up, and yell 'Kendall!'. When I seven, and Katie was born, he made sure I didn't feel left out because of the new baby. He took Logan, Carlos, James, and I to school when it was raining so, we wouldn't get sick. He was my dad, and I loved him. I will never forget him," I said.

I walked back to my seat, and pulled Katie on my lap. It was like she was one again, and she needed her big brother to protect her from the scary world. I was okay with that. I miss when she would come, and crawl on my lap because Carlos had scared her with the stray cat he had caught instead of the raccoon we had been trying to catch. I miss when we chase each other around the yard, and Dad would catch us when he got home from work. No one would _ever _understand our brother/sister relationship. As the funeral ended, Katie cried harder. This is really saying goodbye, letting go of Dad. We stood up, and walked into the basement. I thought it was wrong to have party after my father's funeral.

"Mom, I think I'm going to ask Logan to take Katie and I home," I said.

"Okay, be safe, Kendall," she whispered.

"I will, Mom. I love you," I said.

"I love you too," she said.

"Logan? Can you take us home?" I asked quietly.

"Sure, Kendall," he said.

Katie was still clinging to me, and I knew part of the reason was our family were loons. I mean they were the kind of people that went to jail because they punched someone at a wedding. We walked outside into the cold winter air, and I shivered. I knew one thing for sure; no one would ever forget December now.

"How are you doing?" Logan asked me.

"Fine, I guess. For my dad dieing," I said.

Katie and I got in Logan's car, and buckled in. Katie sat in the middle seat, and I sat on the end. She looked up at me, and frowned.

"You can never replace, Dad, Kendall," she said.

"I know, Katie, I know," I said.

"No one could ever replace you either. You're the best big brother in the world, you know that right?" she asked.

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_A/N: Okay. How bad was it? This was the longest one shot I've ever written. It took me all night, and then some, I know, it's sad that it took me all night. Anyone else notice that Nick has something against people with both parents? Anyway, thanks for reading! Review please! Flames are welcome, just have a point. I hate pointless flames. Seriously. Review! Don't you hate it when you get like fifty hits on a story but no reviews? Well, I do. But hey, if you read my story I'm happy. _


	2. December 12th, 2009

_A/N: Okay, after watching the newest episode of Big Time Rush , I realized Logan can't drive yet. Oh, well. Sorry about that. All my reviewers said they loved it so, here is a part two. And no. I did not plan to write a second chapter. But a fairy told me to write this, nah it was just me. And an idea. Anyways, this is about their first Christmas decorating session without their dad.. This a week after the death of their Dad. His death is still a open wound. You may notice that I kind of made Logan a main (ish) character because I have issues with Logan being a favorite character so…. Yeah, it wasn't on purpose. Oh, before I forget; this is going to be a story because I'm having a lot of fun writing it._

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It just wasn't the same without Dad to lift Katie up so she could put the angel on the tree. Or for him to drink hot chocolate and eat candy canes while reading us The Night Before Christmas. Christmas was always my favorite times of the year because it was so much fun. James, Carlos, and Logan always came over to spend the night on the night before Christmas Eve so we could have a mini Christmas with them; to exchange gifts, and to spend some time together. Now it was a sad time; our first Christmas without Dad.

"Katie?" I asked quietly.

"Huh?" she asked looking up from her computer screen.

"Do you want to help me decorate the Christmas tree?" I asked sitting next to her.

"I guess," she said sadly.

"What if we invited the guys over to hang out, decorate the tree, and eat ice cream?" I asked trying to cheer her up.

"Sure! I'll go get the boxes of ornaments that we are supposed to paint our names on them." That cheered her up immediately; the guys were like brothers to her. They were her best friends too.

I took the phone off the charger, and called Logan first. I tapped my fingers on the couch, and sighed as he answered.

"What's up, Kendall?" he asked.

"Do you want to come over? We offer ice cream, and paint!" I said laughing.

"Sure! I'll call Carlos!" he offered.

"Okay! I'll call James," I said hanging up.

I dialed James' number, and laid backwards on the couch. It felt wrong to do this stuff without Dad. And it was but I couldn't change it. It's only been a week since Dad died, and Katie was still really beat up about it. I didn't blame her; I was too. We've been hanging out a lot more with the guys since he died. They made us laugh, and made smile when no one else could. But I already hung out with them almost everyday, and know it was at least once a day if not two. James answered, and I ran a hand through my hair.

"What's up?" James asked.

"We offer paint, and ice cream. You want to come over?" I asked.

"Sure! Are the other guys coming too?" he asked.

"Yep!" I said hanging up.

Katie came back in with tears running down her face. She was holding the ornaments, and Dad's copy of The Night Before Christmas. I walked over to her, and hugged her. This was a sensitive subject for us. I knew it would be like this all night; crying every time something reminded us of Dad. But that was okay. The guys would be there with us, and they would keep us from having complete breakdowns. I hope. The doorbell rang, and I ran to go answer it. Katie disappeared down the hall to find paint, and I opened the door. Carlos and Logan were standing there each with a duffel bag slung over their shoulder.

"Hey guys!" I said opening the door wider.

They came in, and set their stuff by the door, knowing I wouldn't care. We were the kind of friends that called each other parents 'Mom' and 'Dad', and walked in sometimes yelling 'I'm home!'. Don't ask me why they knocked today because I have absolutely no clue. James opened the door, and walked in. Katie came back in the room with a bunch of jars of paint. She set them on the coffee table, and came to stand by Logan and I. She was always especially attached to Logan; it was weird. You know what? I don't care as long as she's happy. Katie hugged Logan, and he smiled down at her. I looked over at the table where Katie had set down Dad's book. I looked back over at my friends, and glanced at the picture on the wall. James noticed me looking at the pictures, and stuff.

"Are you okay?" James asked me.

"Yeah. Just thinking," I lied.

I don't even know why he asked; he knew I wouldn't be honest in fornt of Katie. She needed me to be strong for her.

"Liar," he muttered.

"James!" I hissed under my breath.

"I'm home!" Mom shouted hitting Carlos with the door.

` I laughed as he stumbled into Logan. Katie stepped back, letting Logan fall backwards into the couch, and Carlos fell onto the hardwood floor.

"I'm sorry!" Mom exclaimed helping Carlos up.

I pulled Logan up, and he was bright red. Mom had three bags from the grocery store, and I took them from her. I went into the kitchen to put the stuff away, and Katie and the guys followed. Katie started unpacking a bag, and she froze. Hot chocolate and candy canes. Logan, Carlos, James, and I all know why she stopped. That was our tradition; eating candy canes and drinking hot chocolate well Dad read to us. We were sixteen, and my dad would've read to us this year. It was just what we did. Was it supposed to be my job or something? I didn't want it to be my job. It was Dad's job. Katie just stared at the box of candy canes. Logan went over to hug, and comfort Katie knowing I was out of it too. Carlos hugged me tightly, and James did too. Would I survive this Christmas without them? No way. I was the 'man of the house'. I took a deep breath, and went over to Katie. I knelt so I could look at her, and pulled her against me.

"Katie, it'll be okay. I'll be here with you. I'll never leave you. Never. If you need anything just ask. I'll protect you from anything and everything," I said kissing her forehead.

"You can't replace Dad, Kendall! You're my big brother, and that's it! Don't even try to replace him because you can't!" Katie said running off into her room.

I started to go after her but Logan caught my arm. What was he thinking? She was my sister, and she was angry with me. I couldn't let her stay angry with me. Oh God. I'm thinking like a father. I shouldn't have to think like this; I'm sixteen.

"Let me," Logan said breaking through my thoughts.

"But-" I was cut off my James clasping his hand over my mouth.

Logan jogged off to Katie's room. I sighed, and James threw a pillow at me. I threw it back. We played catch with the pillow well Logan talked to Katie.

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_Logan POV_

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I knocked on Katie's door softly, and heard her crying. I knew Kendall meant well but maybe he was going to extremes.

"Go away, Kendall!" she yelled her voice thick form crying.

"It's not Kendall," I said.

I opened the door, and sat next to Katie. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, and she laid her head in my lap. I let her cry it out, it was best for her to let it out now instead of later.

"Kendall means well," I said quietly.

Katie didn't say anything; she was still crying. I hugged her gently, trying to show her I was there for her without telling her. That why it blew up with Kendall. She closed her eyes, and wiped the tears off her cheeks.

"I'll go back out there if you promise to help me put the star on the tree," she said grinning at me.

"Okay. I promise," I said laughing.

To my surprise she grabbed my hand, and I felt like she was little kid again. Kendall and I were her favorite people in the world (Shhh. Don't tell the guys!). I glanced at her dresser, and saw picture of Carlos, Kendall, James, Katie, and I. It was from her most recent birthday party. She grasped my hand tightly as we walked back out to the kitchen area. Kendall sighed in relief when he saw his sister wasn't crying anymore.

"Let's paint ornaments!" James exclaimed throwing a paint brush at my head.

We all gathered around the counter/breakfest bar, and got out the bulbs, and paint. Katie took the green paint on the end of her paint brush, and painted my nose green. I laughed as Carlos painted my forehead yellow. I took my paint brush, and dipped it in the pink paint. I brushed it over his lips, and Kendall painted James' bangs purple.

"I am _so _going to get you for that!" James exclaimed painting Kendall's forearms red.

Mrs. Knight came in, and looked angry. She never got angry with us. Never, not even when we brought a robin inside the house.

"What are guys thinking? That stuff could be toxic!" she exclaimed running to the sink to wet a washcloth.

"Mrs. Knight, it's Crayola. Non toxic," James said not realizing she was in a dangerous mood.

She dismissed him, and began to wipe the paint off our faces. Katie looked at her feet guiltily.

"Don't feel bad," I said taking her hand again.

"James, you're going to have to wash your hair. I can't get it out," Mrs. Knight sighed.

We were silent as we painted our names on the bulbs. After we were done we started putting the lights on the tree, and James was chattering at us about some celebrity. Katie was sitting on the floor by Kendall and I's feet absorbed in her thoughts. Sometimes I wondered what she was thinking, right now I had a pretty good guess; her dad.

"Logan?" Katie asked me quietly.

"Yeah?" I asked sitting next to her.

"Do you love me?" she asked staring at the fireplace.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Do you think of me like your sister?" she asked turning to me.

"Of course!" I said hugging her.

"Good," she whispered into my shoulder.


	3. December 24th, 2009

_A/N: I don't feel like this chapter is as good as my others but here it is! Were the characters OOC? Just wondering. I wonder a lot. Feel free to tell me where I can elaborate or where I elaborated too much... _

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"Merry Christmas!" the guys chorused with their hands behind their backs.

"Merry Christmas! What are you hiding?" I asked covering my head with a pillow.

"We'll tell you if you get up," Logan teased.

"You'll have to carry me," I groaned.

Logan picked me up, and swung me over his shoulder.

"Logan! I want to sleep!" I exclaimed hitting his back.

"Too bad," he said.

I sighed as he carried me down the hall. He set me down by the tree, and I collapsed on the coach. Logan picked up my feet, and sat under my feet. I sat up, and saw presents in the guys' hands. I leaned on the arm of the couch, and grabbed the presents I had gotten them. I got up, and let the guys squish together on the couch then sat on Kendall's lap. I handed my presents to the guys, and the handed me presents too. Then they exchanged presents that they got each other, and I grinned.

"Let's open them!" I exclaimed.

We each got a present out, and I chose the one Kendall got me.

"I'm opening the one from Carlos," Logan said.

"I'm opening the one from James," Carlos said.

"I'm opening the one from Kendall," James said.

"I'm opening the from Katie," Kendall said.

"I'm opening one from Kendall," I said.

It was our tradition to tell each other who's present we were opening. We tore open the presents, and I smiled. Kendall got me the t-shirt I had been wanting. Logan got a book, Carlos got fancy straps for his helmet, James got gold colored mirror, and Kendall got a hockey puck signed by Chris Drury; his favorite hockey player.

"Oh my God! Katie! How'd you get this?" he exclaimed.

"Pawn shop. It's real; don't worry. I saved up all year," I said.

"Thank you!" he said hugging me.

I smiled, and leaned against his chest.

"I remember doing this with Dad," I said quietly.

"Doing what?" Kendall asked softly.

"Sitting on his lap, and leaning against his chest. Feeling the warmth of his body," I said looking at Kendall's hands.

"I have an idea," Logan said.

"What's that?" I asked curiously.

"Let's all share our favorite memories of Mr. Knight. It going to be hard but I think it'll be good for us," he said.

"I'll start; my favorite memory is when we would sit around the fireplace, and he would read us The Night Before Christmas. I remember him sleeping in the living room with us, and he would be up all night making sure we were okay," Kendall said.

"My favorite memory was when Mr. Knight took me to my first book club. I was in first grade, and my mom and dad were at work. I was too scared to go in so, he held my hand, and let sit on his lap the whole time," Logan said looking out the window.

"My favorite memory was when Mr. Knight took us to our first hockey game, and cheered us on. Even after we lost he took us to get pizza," Carlos said.

"My favorite memory is when Mr. Knight took us to see Toy Story 2," James said.

"My favorite memory was when Dad would brush my hair every night before I went to bed. He did it the night before he…" I trailed off.

Kendall hugged me tighter, and I started to cry. I felt Kendall's stomach puffing in and out more quicker then it would if he was just breathing; he was crying too. I don't know how long we just sat there sobbing, and when our sobs subsided James pulled me onto his lap, and felt him pulling a comb through my hair. He took the hair tie off my wrist, and gently started to braid my hair.

"I can't let you not comb your hair!" he exclaimed quietly.

"Thanks, James. I love you guys," I said taking Kendall and Carlos' hands.

"I love you too, Katie," Logan said reaching over to hug me.

"I love you," Carlos said squeezing my hand.

"I love you," James said continuing to braid my hair.

"Aw, Katie! You know I love you!" Kendall said squeezing my hand.

By now we had forgotten the other presents. Logan pulled me onto his lap, and I turned to hug him. I rested my head on his chest; he kissed my head. Logan was my favorite. Shhh! Don't tell the guys (especially Kendall.).

"Hey, Logie, hand me your iPod," I said.

"Why?" he asked eyeing me oddly.

"Oh, just give it," I said sitting up.

He wasn't budging so, I reached into his pocket and grabbed it. I turned on 'Come Clean' by Hilary Duff, and Logan turned bright red. I started dancing to the beat, and singing; Logan was covering his head with a pillow. Kendall was next to stand up and start dancing, and singing. Then Carlos. Then James.

"**LET THE RAIN FALL DOWN AND WAKE MY DREAMS! LET IT WASH AWAY MY SANITY. 'CAUSE I WANT TO FEEL THE THUNDER; I WANT TO SCREAM! LET THE RAIN FALL DOWN! I'M COMING CLEAN! I'M CLEAN! I'M COMING CLEAN!" **we sang being completely obnoxious.

Next on Logan's play list was 'Lips of an Angel' by Hinder. I heard a bunch of complaining; 'That's no fun!'. I skipped that, and 'One Time' by Justin Bieber came on.

"**WHEN I MET YOU GIRL, MY HEART WENT KNOCK KNOCK! NOW THEM BUTTERFLIES IN MY STOMACH WON'T STOP, STOP! EVEN THOUGH IT'S A STRUGGLE LOVE IS ALL WE GOT! SO WE GOING TO KEEP KEEP CLIMBING TO THE MOUNTAIN TOP! **

**YOUR WORLD IS MY WORLD! MY FIGHT IS YOUR FIGHT! MY BREATH IS YOUR BREATH! AND YOU HEARD, YOU'RE MY LIFE! GIRL, YOU'RE MY ONE LOVE, MY ONE HEART, MY ONE LIFE FOR SURE. LET ME TELL YOU ONE TIME. I'MMA TELL YOU ONE TIME," **we were still screaming and being obnoxious when Logan got up and started to dance and sing too.

Mom walked in rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, laughing as she saw us. I hit 'pause' on Logan's iPod, as Logan grabbed me and threw me over his shoulder.

"You are _so _getting it!" he exclaimed starting towards the hottub.

"You wouldn't," I said kicking his stomach.

"I believe I would," he said smirking.

"_KENDALL!_" I screeched hoping my big brother would help me.

"It's all you, little sis," he said ruffling my hair as he walked by laughing.

"What kind of big brother are you?" I demanded as Logan dropped me into the hot tub.

I came up sputtering, and I took a bucket from next to the hottub, dunked under the water, and doused Logan with it. He looked like a drowned rat; his hair was plastered to his face in some places, and sticking up in others. He jumped over the side, and into the hottub at the same time as Carlos. Kendall dragged James into the hottub, and then stood outside of tub.

"Kendall!" James exclaimed combing his hair with his lucky comb.

"What?" he asked innocently using his big green eyes on us.

"No fair! You are _**NOT **_allowed to use your eyes on us!" I exclaimed grabbing his hand, and yanking on it.

James stood up, and pulled Kendall in. He came up laughing; it was infectious. We all began laughing hysterically, and smiling. Kendall and Logan pulled me over next to them, and began tickling me.

"I….. Hate…. You…!" I exclaimed through laughs.

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_A/N: How'd you like it? Well, you should review because reviews makes authors want to write more. (Hint, hint.) Any suggestions for some Katie/Carlos bonding are very, very welcome! Now, there is a button at the bottom of this page. Click it and review! :) OH! I don't own BTR (Nick owns it.) or One Time (Justin Bieber owns it.) or Justin Bieber (He owns himself.) or Coming Clean (Hilary Duff owns it.) or Hilary Duff (She owns herself.)._


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